Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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