Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize