She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
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