this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Randomize
