Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
It's official drugs can't kill me
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
