Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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