...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
