Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Randomize
