ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
