I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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