well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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