Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Randomize