You just made me feel so damn special
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
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