youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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