Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize