I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Randomize
