He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
