So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize
