I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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