It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
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