Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
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