So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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