Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
