I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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