Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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