And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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