This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
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