my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
