I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
