it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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