Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Randomize
