In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
