I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
