Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
