if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
