Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize