we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
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