im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize
