Got a toothbrush?
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Just pee around me
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
