just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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