I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
