Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
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