Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
