All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
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