I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
