Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize