I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
how can u be prego again
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
The cops high fived after they tackled you
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Randomize
