so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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