we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
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