Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
