we're chasing vodka with high fives
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
